Eberts Thumb

Not your average giant crocodile movie

Primeval is a movie about the daily lives of some of the people of Burundi as they deal with poverty, civil war, and corruption set against the backdrop of a giant crocodile eating everyone in its path. Or its the other way around. Either way, its based on true events.

The plot of Primeval is that a news crew is sent to Burundi to track down and capture a crocodile named "Gustave" after he ate a UN aid worker. This is our main characters chance to redeem himself after a news story blows up in his face when its discovered he made stuff up. To catch Gustave they enlist the help of a naturalist and a poacher who don't get along for some reason. After the cameraman films the local warlord executing some of the locals, the news team finds itself on the run from his henchmen and Gustave.

The true events of the movie are that there is a crocodile named Gustave in Burundi's Rusizi river is said to have eaten over 300 people. He is reportedly 20 feet long, weights 1 ton, and is over 60 years old. There is also a naturalist who has been tracking him for over 20 years, and there was a National Geographic article written about him here. No word on whether the journalist was chased by warlords.

Primeval has a lot of things going for it. The acting was good, especially from Orlando Jones. The creature effects were well done. The story was believable and mostly made sense. The big drawback to Primeval is that it sold itself as a one dimensional monster slasher movie when it had a lot more depth to it. People expecting a typical monster movie will be a bit disappointed by this, but if you going in knowing that its equal parts crocodile and warlord movie, you'll enjoy Primeval.

Eberts Thumb's Ratings
Entertainment: 85%	B-Movieness: 10%
Quality: 87%	Regret: 0%

Crap Bag

They got crocodiles out der dis big?

A giant stealthy crocodile combined with ill planned traps, poorly conceived escape attempts and bad guys with terrible shooting abilities. These movie starts with a UN team digging up some mass graves whose occupants are believed to have been victims of a local cartel leader. One of the UN workers is investigating a grave when she is pulled into the river. The UN envoy that is supposed to providing protection begins to open fire on the general area where the worker was pulled under water. A pool of blood begins to form and then a mauled torso begins to surface. The scene now switches to a news room where one of the main reporters Tim Manfrey gets busted for miss reporting a news story. To rebuild his rep as well as help out a fledgling reporter Aviva Masters, he goes to Africa to try and hunt down the killer which is expected to be a giant crocodile named Gustave. A local official gives them some assistance in planning their trip as well as some armed escorts for protection. The news team meets up with a zoologist and a local guide and with help from some locals hey setup a trap for Gustave. Somehow this nearly 30 foot long crocodile is extremely stealthy and smart. Evading the trap set for him and almost killing everyone in the hunting party. The camera witnesses some rebels killing some locals and manages to video tape the entire incident. He tells the rest of the group and the guards who are spying on them for the leader of the rebels. The guards attack the news team, who are then rescued by Gustave who manages to sneak into the tent. Some of them mange to escape but are then hunted down by the rebels who seem to have problems shooting moving targets, but can drive through any terrain. They get rescued by the local official who turns out to be the leader of the rebels. The leader has been using Gustave to dispose of his victims. They manage to escape by covering him with the crocodile urine which attracts Gustave whom eventually eats him.

Crap Bag's Ratings
Entertainment: 85%	B-Movieness: 20%
Quality: 90%	Regret: 5%