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BMDB Award System Print E-mail

The BMDB Award Systemâ„¢ is a way to reward, recognize, and draw attention specific featurs of B movies. A movie may have numerous awards or none at all, but the number of awards does not necessarly signify a good movie as these awards are given for specific features that can be desirable or undesirable in nature.

Excuse to Launder Money

Excuse to Launder MoneyThis award is given to those movies that are produced in areas of the globe where corruption and organized crime is a problem and you can't help but wonder if the location was chosen in order to launder large amounts of dirty money. For example, such locations include Eastern European Countries like Bucharest.

Worst Movie Ever

Worst Movie EverThe award is given to those movies that are so incredibly terrible that they should be packed into a rocket and shot into the sun. It is a crime against humanity for these movies to exist on the shelves of the local video store waiting for a poor unsuspecting citizen to waste precious hours of their life.

Best Parts Were In The Preview

Best Parts Were In The PreviewThis award is given to those movies that intentionally take the 30 seconds of decent footage they contain and devout most of their effort and budget into creating a really good preview that deceives viewers into thinking it is a worthwhile movie. Of course, viewers end up dissapointed when they find out the preview was misleading and was in fact a lot better than the feature.

So Bad It Was Good

So Bad It Was GoodThis award is givcen to those movies that are so bad they actually become good. Indeed, it is a paradox that has to be seen to be believed.

100% B Movie

100% B MovieThis award is given to movies that are the eptiome of a B-movie. The reviewers might not have given them 100% on B-movieness, but they are close enough to warrant this award.

Unintentionally Funny

Unintentionally FunnyPoor acting, bad special effects, and a low budget can sometimes equal hilarious even though the movie is not a comedy. Those movies proudly receive this award. In case you don't understand the picture to your left, click it for the bigger picture.

Babylon 5

Babylon 5Computer special effects are all the rage, but that doesn't mean every movie should have them. It still costs money to do them and some movies should have hired some drafting students from the local tecnhical school to build some models rather then splurge $10,000 on that guy with the Mac who does Maya in his parents garage. This award goes to movies with terrible special effects.

Budget Stretch

Budget StretchThis award recognizes those movies that are clearly being filmed on a shoestring budget and yet, pull together some memorable scenes.

B-Movie Star Heavyweight

B-Movie Star HeavyweightIf the movie contains a B-movie star such as Van Damme, Seagal, Henriksen, or Lamas, then this award is pinned upon its chest.

Not A B-Movie, Just Foreign

Not A B-Movie, Just ForeignSometimes foregin movies seem like B-movies because they don't make sense, are werid, and you've never heard of them, but sometimes these foreign movies can turn out to be quite enjoyable. This award recongizes forgeign movies mistaken for B-movies because of their dubbing, cultural differences, or simply because we hadn't heard of them.

Scientician

ScienticianThe scientician award goes to movies that espouse very shaky scientific premises and theories. If you think hiding in a cave can protect you from absolute zero then maybe you should take some courses at your local college.

Made-4-TV

Made-4-TVMade-for-TV movies are like B-movies in terms of budget and acting, but they also strip out all the violence and swearing. Sometimes we get a made-for-TV movie and regret it every single time.

Knockoff

KnockoffWhen a huge Hollywood blockbuster is released, some smaller studios attempt to reap the benefits of this by releasing a direct-to-video knockoff movie. This award goes to those valient attempts that have fooled countless people into renting The Da Vinci Treasure while The Da Vinci Code was still in theatres.

Wang

WangMaybe it's just us, but the frequency of wang in B movies seems inordinately high. This is how we warn you.

We warned you! 

Gratuitous Nudity

Gratuitous NudityBecause B movies lack good acting, story, and special effects, directors and writers frequently rely on gratuitous nudity to draw in the 13-year old male crowd. If you see the protangonist stop half-way through a car chase and go in to a strip club to make change for a five, then you know it's shamless and pointless exploitation.

Cheese

CheeseThis award goes to those movies that are corny, campy, and hilariously cheap props. It's a broad category, but if your movie uses nightvision goggles that are just swim goggles with LEDs glued to them or any part of your set contains paper mache, then you are cheesy!

Gore

GoreOne thing B-movies, especially slasher flicks, get right is gore. Like the sound of a jar of mayonnaise being fisted, movies with this award will make you cringe (unless you like to fist jars of mayonnaise).

Cliche

ClicheThere are many cliches that are beaten to death by the cinema stick. B-movies in particular are susceptible because they do not have the money or motivation to try anything other than the formulas of the past. Movies that make a point of not breaking the mold get this award slapped on them.

A-novie

A-movieSometimes B-movies wear us down and to avoid becoming drooling vegetables, homicidal manicas, or suicidal basket cases, we treat ourselves to a trip to the theatre or a hollywood rental. Provided these movies don't blow (Cabin Fever, See No Evil, etc.), we classify them as grade A (otherwise, it's grade B-movie).

Boring

BoringB-movies can be very boring especially when they take themselves seriously or attempt anything dramatic. To help identify those movies that we coudln't even make fun of, we award this honor.

Illogic

IllogicB-movies can be chockful of non-sequitors, nonsensical plot twists and dialogue, and a movie universe where rules constantly change and everything is inconsistent. To these movies, we salute you with this award featuring an angry Spock.

 
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